Wasted years ?
I don’t think it’s unusual for people to feel like they have wasted some years of their life.
- Wasted years in a relationship.
- Wasted years in a job.
- Wasted years studying a course that we never used.
- Wasted years not living authentically.
- Wasted years living others agendas and never our own.
- Wasted years in an outdated religion.
Do you believe you have wasted years in your life?
My current thinking is that we can choose our beliefs about life. I know from personal experience how the beliefs about ourselves and life can cause pain and suffering. My belief, that I would not be acceptable as I was, created a life of struggle and torment for 22 years. But were they wasted years?
Now I would never tell you what to believe………. that is your choice. But here is something I know has helped some clients I’ve coached to change their thinking. A good coach asks the right questions and allows the client to discover the answers for themselves. A good coach never tells you what to do or believe.
Here are some questions you can ask yourself.
- What if, the wasted years were not wasted at all but part of the journey?
- What if the detour you took in the journey of life was not a detour at all but the path you were meant to be on?
- If you believed that every experience in life was meant to happen. How would that change the way you feel?
- If you changed your view of what you consider negative in your life would that change who you are now?
Interesting questions?
Loading a new software program in your brain
When I see a coaching client change a belief then it changes the way they view the world and their life. It’s like loading new software program onto the computer. You hear it clicking away in the background re-programming existing files so they can be viewed from a new and improved perspective. They are reframing their past with a new awareness. If I load the latest version of PowerPoint on my computer, then when I open the files I created years ago the content is the same but now I can use improved and additional features to change the look. Same old material but new perspectives and freedom to do new things.
Personally I feel like there were never any wasted years. What I previously might have considered wasted I now see as times when I gained ….not lost. I feel like I’ve never been off the path. This is the journey I was meant to have. Every experience has given me something of value and made me who I am today. Now it is up to me to create meaning and purpose from all I have received both good and bad. It works extraordinarily well for me and I live with a profound sense of purpose.
Let’s face it.
- Without the cold we would never know how beautiful it is to feel warmth
- With being broken we would not know what it is like to feel whole
- Without the pain we would never know healing
- Without sorrow we would never be able to know what joy is
No-one is guaranteed a perfect life……just a life. And all the experiences make up the rich tapestry we call life.
Make it a rule of life never to regret and never to look back. Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can’t build on it; it’s only for wallowing in.
Katherine Mansfield
Never regret. If it’s good, it’s wonderful. If it’s bad, it’s experience.
Victoria Holt
Got some years you’d rather forget, bury or live in denial about? Don’t waste them. They are all you’ve got. Use them to your advantage.
Coaching can give you a whole new perspective in life.
If you are considering the possibility of being coached, I offer a no obligation, complimentary, one hour consultation
Please Note: I have successfully coached clients in the many parts of the world and all over Australia either on the phone, via the internet (Skype etc) and face to face for people in Sydney. Face to face or using other forms of communication, clients always get the same life-changing results. Your privacy is always respected and strict confidentiality assured.








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